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Of Love, Blood and Eternity

Darkness embraces me as the first rays of the sun kiss the eastern horizon. Light pokes its fingers through high windows, but none touches down into the room that is my resting place. I can hear the bird songs and the buzz of bees. I stare into the blackness around me and remember a simple sunrise, the purples, oranges, and pinks that pierce the skies as the sun chases away the vastness of the night. I remember a time when sunrise was a welcome friend.

Now my only brightness comes from the moon and stars. I am bound to wander the night. My human self has long ago died and I have become immortal, but the cost is high.

My skin, though paler than the face of the moon, will stay soft and youthful for all eternity. My golden blonde hair will never gray. A vain person knowing not what I know would celebrate such a stroke of luck as finding the proverbial fountain of youth, but it comes not without its responsibilities.

Kindred, I have many. Mortals cannot fathom us. They are never sure that we exist. To them, we are fantasy, legend passed down from generation to generation, though we walk through life side by side since the beginning of time. We interact with them; we hold jobs for the sheer normalcy of co-existing in their world.

Morality in my world is a curse. We are nocturnal and need life’s blood to survive. At first, I could do with small animals, such as rats and possums, menial creatures that did not encourage the fathomless guilt to rise up and battle my new self. Survival in all creatures is primary to existence. I swallowed disgust as I swallowed life’s elixir to exist.

I did not ask for this hell that has been cruelly bestowed upon me. Perhaps in an obscure way, I did. For I alone, am responsible for my decision. I was given fair warning twenty odd years ago when I fell in love with the most beautiful man…

I was in an old English rose garden, encompassed by statuary, fountains with water trickling like tiny waterfalls, and little concrete benches. The air was heavy with the perfume of flowers and wet peat. Andrés was beside me his hand gently holding my elbow as we wandered through the moonlit garden. We made quiet small talk as we strolled. The night was warm and the sky clear with stars scattered across its expanse.

He stopped, turned toward me and lifted my chin with a finger. Those brilliant eyes settled on mine. I looked away blushing, but he gently turned me back, his tawny eyes once again captured mine. His hand seemed cool although, it felt good against my flushed cheek. He touched his lips to mine. I felt rapture and fear together. Never had a kiss affected me this way. His kiss became more urgent and his arms embraced me tightly. I found myself answering his passion. My arms enfolded his neck and our tongues met hesitantly at first then passionately entwined with one another in slow exploration. My body was on fire. I felt as if I couldn’t breathe. Our bodies crushed together, gyrating in a slow rhythmic dance. His hands traced up and down my body while his lips caressed my face and neck. His tongue tickled along a vein pulsing in my throat and I felt gentle nips and bites. Just when I could stand no more, he stopped and turned away from me. My emotions suspended for a moment in mid air. I caught myself and stepped to him placing my hand on his turned shoulder.

“What burdens you, my love?” I whispered.

He didn’t turn but answered quietly, “There is much you need to know about me, Tia. Loving me is dangerous. Before it is too late you must know what I am.”

“But, Andrés, you know that I love you. What could possibly be so horrible?”

“I am cursed, my love.” He turned to face me. His eyes seemed to glow amber like an animal’s caught in light. A vein pulsed blue on his pale temple. “I am a creature of the night. I hunt to survive.” He cupped my face in his hands and looked deep into my eyes. “Tia, I drink the blood of humans and animals for survival. Without it I shall wither and die.”

I turned away. “But how? Who did this to you?”

“Long ago, I was seduced by a witch. She was angered because I would not do her bidding. She wanted me to love her but I could not. She took revenge and cursed me to walk the earth like an animal never to see the sunlight again. Never to be loved. Why would anyone choose such an existence?” He finished sadly. “Tia, that was over a century ago.”

I stood staring at this man I had grown to love. I was blinded by infatuation. I never realized that I’d not seen him in the light of day. Why had I never questioned or wondered what activities filled his days? I didn’t know. What I did know was, even though fear prickled my spine and nausea threatened my stomach, I did not want to live without this man.

Before I could speak, he said to me, “I want you to take some time, my love. Think on what I have told you this night. I will leave you to wrestle these things. I offer you immortality. But, my angel, your existence will not be pleasant. You will never know the warmth of the sun on your face nor will you savor anything other than the thick metallic taste of blood on your lips. You will be forced to wander the night forever. It must be your choice. Think long and hard, Tia. Be absolutely sure. If you choose nay, I will leave you, for it would be dangerous should I stay.”

“But…” He put a finger to my lips to quiet me, silent tears wet on my cheeks. He embraced me, turned and walked into the darkness.

***

“Tia, you are so beautiful.” Andrés said holding me at arms length. “The moonlight compliments your beauty.”
The moon had just risen and looked huge in the sky. It bathed the garden with a resplendent light that made the roses appear black their leaves pewter. It seemed my surroundings were suddenly cast black, silver and white. I wore a long flowing white gown. It seemed appropriate, for I had made my decision.

Andrés lifted my chin so I looked up at him. Our eyes caught and held. He smiled. “It is such a beautiful night, is it not?”

Before I could answer, he bent and touched his lips to mine. I instantly burned with lust. His touch was so cool yet I was on fire. Odd. His hands seemed to be everywhere. My body felt like a mound of clay that only he could mold. Every inch of my skin screamed out to be touched.

His hands trailed down my sides. He lifted me effortlessly and as our mouths locked once again in an erotic kiss. I wrapped my arms around his neck. He held me to him with one arm while his other hand entangled in my hair and pulled my head back to stare into my face flushed with passion. “Tia…”

“ Take me, Andrés. I choose you…”

Then I lost myself. His lips brushed my neck lightly. The feathery kisses became nips and suddenly I felt a glimmer of pain followed by total ecstasy. I swooned in his arms. I felt my heart pound in my chest and roaring in my ears. Then, blackness as life’s blood was drawn out of me, slowly with the last of my essence I felt myself falling in a vast empty void. Spinning. Silence.

I felt a gentle prodding and a warm wetness on my lips. I hungered. My tongue danced slowly over my lips. I tasted the saltiness and the hunger grew. Greedily, I drank what was offered. I opened my eyes and realized that Andrés had slit his wrist and offered me his own blood. My eyes widened in fear but he held me and spoke comfort softly in my ear.

“My blood is your blood. I am yours for all eternity as you are mine. We shall share the night together, my love.”

I gasped and bent forward as a sharp pain shuddered through my entire body. Doubling over, I wretched and vomited. I wrapped my arms across my stomach and moaned a high pitch sound that I didn’t recognize as my own. It sounded more like the yelp of an animal caught in a hunter’s trap.

“The pain will pass. It is your human substance dying. You will purge and become as I, immortal. I will guide you through, my love.”

And he did, lovingly and with tenderness, guide me to what I have now become.

Copyright ©2003 by Sharon L Connors